Becki Snow: The Schiavo Chronicles |
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TERRI SCHIAVO TO DIE IN ATTORNEY'S DEATH FACTORY ?
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Undercover Investigation reveals the truth - hubby's attorney was Chairman of the Board for "Hospice", and Terri WILL die while in the hospice's "care"...
Author's note: new items posted daily, below lead story
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Thursday, March 31, 2005
Breaking Fast, Body and Soul When the end came, it was an achingly poigniant way to break fast. I arrived at Hospice shortly after Terri's death. Do not expect tears from me at a funeral; I never cry at a funeral. I am the one running around in the background, helping people with their wheelchairs, taking water to old folks, making sure that people are greeted at the door. There will always be time for crying later. So I approached this day - not with tears, but with a determination find some job to do. I came upon Catholic Mass in progress, and at the helm was Father Melanowski. This is a man's man, a tall white-haired military Chaplain who served bravely in combat during the Korean War. Hale and fiesty at 82, he has been Terri's Priest, and if I were ever to become Catholic this man would be the reason. He's the kind of man who makes you believe in priests again. He and I have known each other for years, and even though he knows I am not Catholic, he never hesitates to bless me and call me by name. I confessed to him this week that I am truly a sinner, and yet he still seems ever caring, ever understanding. His support and concern for me throughout this hunger strike has been unwavering, so I am profoundly grateful to him. Upon seeing him, I fell to my knees and joined the service, in the grass in front of what used to be Terri's earthly prison. It was lovely, the meditative rhythms of the Aves rising above the reality of passing trucks and strolling passers-by. Then the Bread and the Wine were adored, and it was time to partake of the Eucharist - for everyone but me. I have never minded that; the belief that the Body and Blood of Christ are sacred and not to be taken lightly is more important than my need to feel included. When attending a Catholic mass, I simply cross my hands over my chest and bow my head so that the priest may give me a blessing rather than the Sacrament, thus avoiding any irreverance on my part. I prepared myself as Father Melanowski drew near, making the sign for him to pass even though I knew that he would merely bless me as he had so often before. The sign was merely to let others know I was refusing communion out of respect for their beliefs, not because of any lack of desire on my part. Father Melanowski held up the host, and the sun shone through it. He pointed at me. I whispered to the man beside me "I think he means you". "No", the man whispered back, "he wants you". Had the Father forgotten? Perhaps the stress had caused him to forget; I did truly want the sacrament, and it was plain from my expression that I longed for the comfort of Communion with God. None were there to give me this comfort from any other church, so I had no where else to turn. But I was afraid of making any mistake; I once again bowed my head, crossed my arms and patted visibly, so he might see it clearly. Father Melanowski now stepped directly in front of me, and he bent down from the full six feet two to put himself directly in front of me. He looked into my eyes: we've been through the fire together, haven't we friend? We have been witness and we are changed forever... "I know" he spoke with great tenderness. "This is for you - in memory of Terri". I opened my mouth, speechless, and he place the wafer upon my tongue. It was then I leaned forward in disbelief and gratitude; in a moment of sadness, I had been given a great blessing. Still kneeling, I hid my face in the green grass and finally wept. The fast was ended. Denied Last Visit By Family, Terri Schiavo Dies According to the word of the almighty god Michael Schiavo, the Schindlers will never see Terri again in this world. They did not know that their last visit with Terri was dictated not by the hand of God, but by the will of her husband. I knew that my last words to my father were my last words. His last words to me, whispered over the phone in a haze of morphine, are held in my heart like gold. I was not allowed to be at his side when the end finally came - I was held hostage by a pregnancy gone berserk, and rules I was told I could not break. Had my father even seen my face, I was told, it worry him so I would make him angry with my presence. I was not even to see his funeral; I went into labor that morning, and gave birth as the service for my Father had just started... The empty hole in the heart is never filled. Now the Schindlers grieve, knowing they were denied that last chance to see their daughter before death. Michael Schiavo and Hospice have taken away everything they can from Terri Schiavo; now they have taken away love, however far off and faint that might be. The love that comes from a mother's hand to a child's face, the smell of a father's aftershave, the last kiss of sister and brother... And so Terri dies - surrounded by police, freshly watered flowers at her feet, thirsting to death under the gaze of strangers. Sans food, sans water, sans mercy... may God have mercy on our souls. Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Hunger Strike - THE BLOG: Dispassionate Discharge of Duty  This is what it has come to: the courts dragged Bob and Mary Schindler to Atlanta, then rejected the case based on the idea that it was "time for dispassionate discharge of duty". A duty to what? To kill a bedridden disabled woman? What the **** kind of duty is that? It's so alliterative, so rhythmic, one almost forgets to ask the question at hand: a duty to whom? A duty to courts? A duty to judges? To whom? For what? Why? Suddenly we are told that this is our duty, to kill Terri Schiavo - who left no written directive - purely at the behest of her husband. It is our duty to kill her so her "husband" may now marry the woman he has lived with and fathered children with for almost ten years. It is our duty to starve and dehydrate to death this woman, who cannot speak for herself, so she will no longer haunt our TV screens with her withered and tortured image. This is now our duty - not to defend the weak and protect the innocent, but to kill this woman by the most brutal means possible. This is our duty. It has been a long hard day. I arrived at hospice at 4:30AM, with my sleeping bag in tow. The boredom of not having anything to ingest besides low-calorie Gatorade, Pedialyte and water is starting to really get to me. The fatigue is becoming more insidious, and it must be addressed earlier in the day. Stomach troubles are starting to become more pronounced; people here have made it known that I could quit now and no one would mind. Still, the hunger strike continues, but not because it serves any media purpose any longer... I started this hunger strike because I wanted to find out for myself if the doctors and experts were lying about the "painless nature" of this procedure. I wanted to share my findings with others so that the truth might be known. In the course of this experiment, I found that the "experts" were lying. I have educated myself and others, and I know what is true within my own experience. In all honestly, the experiment has done what it was called to do - I could just as easily start eating tonight, were it not for the fact that I cannot in good conscience do it. I feel as if the hunger strike is something required of me, a promise to hold fast to the end - no matter what the end may be. Let it come, and to **** with all those who feel they must "dispassionately discharge" their "duty" of killing an innocent woman... I have a duty of my own. Federal Court Rules to Consider Petition By Schindlers In the dead of night, we get a ray of hope... a thin one, but we are entering the 13th day without food or water for Terri Schiavo. This in itself is a miracle - the woman who, on the testimony of her husband, wanted to die is fighting to live. It is miraculous in itself that she has survived this long; if she had really wanted to be dead, she would have died days ago. While they are fighting about the feeding tube, they should insert an IV NOW. There is no reason to wait until the court rules for the feeding tube - instead, the should start her immediately on fluids until the petition is heard. No, it DOESN'T hurt to have an IV drip inserted, and it doesn't hurt to receive fluids after days of dehydration. You know what hurts? Starving and thirsting to death. We don't execute criminals while awaiting an appeal, and we should halt the execution of Terri Schiavo until we know the outcome of her hearing. God bless Jesse Jackson - I wonder if he had a hand in this. I'm going back out to the Hospice tonight with my sleeping bag and pillow. I'm camping out with those saying the rosary. It is a good time to pray and reflect in the wee hours, with only the police dogs and the flood lights and the occasional photographer to keep me company. Not that there's anything wrong with that... Tuesday, March 29, 2005
It's Not The Meat, It's the Humidity  Now that Operation Dehydration is officially over, I can say without a doubt in my mind that the lack of water is the key to pain. While I'm still on Hunger Strike, the maladies of the last week have disappeared, leaving only the fatigue and occasional nausea in it's place. Looking back, the dehydration caused terrible headaches, cramps, and pain. Most distressing to me is the change in cognitive ability and personality. I just have to read the posts to see how it made me into a much more submissive, weepy person. Not to mention it really mauled my writing. Ack. Now I know this: dehydration is brutal, it's barbaric, and no one should be forced to die this way, in pain. Oooh, Terri doesn't feel pain, you say. Well, even on the off chance that you are wrong about the pain, let us not forget the thousands of people who have died this way in nursing homes and hospices who have happened to be able to feel pain just fine, thank you. Their only crime was, they were old and in the way of a fat inheritance. My new handler, Marcy, watch her own mother died this way after a relative seized her power of attorney, and her story is gruesome beyond words. Her mom died in her arms after 14 days of Hell on Earth, moaning for water. Even though Marcy wanted to care for her mother, and her mother wanted to live, it made no difference. Once the authorities have determined that you need to die, you will die. Terri's is the test case for going legal with this process, since she left no living will, and no one really knows what she wants. It's not just about her - it's about all of us. But no one will stop the process once it starts, ya know; it's painless, ya know, right? The Doctors say so. I guess Doctors are gods now, they are able to read minds and be all right all the time. Sure. Speaking of which, have you read Felos' comments in his book "Litigation as Spiritual Practice" from Blue Dolphin Publishing? He claims that he can communicate with the souls of disabled women, and they cry out to him for their own deaths. Yeah baby, that's professionalism for you. I had no clue, but my husband called me yesterday to tell me my picture was in the Denver Post. I'm really surprised it didn't get edited out - I have a face for radio, and I've never had any delusions about that. I wish I could say that the camera doesn't like me, but in reality, nope, I really look like that. I'll live. Anyhow, I had gone out by myself about 2:30AM, just leaning against the fence post and praying when I heard a noise next to me. I looked to see the photographer from the St. Petersburg Times. He was very nice to me and asked to take my picture, but it's a little uncomfortable when one is praying. But he said, "Just keep doing what you're doing" and so I closed my eyes and went back to praying as best I could. But it's a little hard when a camera's going click click. It just feels wrong, like one should hide one's face or something. So I turned my head - and that's the pic he chose. I just saw the picture. It's very nice, but for some reason it looks like I'm trying to force my way through the fence. Yeehaw, I'm coming in... Anyhow, it makes me a little uncomfortable. I've been hiding down at the ends now to hide and pray, because I don't want to be a hypocrite and pray for a camera. I'm still praying for Terri, just hidden away where I hope God is the only one who sees me. Yes, I'm still praying. God hears me, and that's what I'll lean on until this terrible process comes to it's conclusion - whatever that may be. We're going down to Hospice as soon as Jesse Jackson gets finished there. He showed up today and I'm grateful for the support; I just don't want to jump into the middle of the media circus. I heard that Ken Melman of the GOP is coming to Florida today, too - not to come and plead for Terri's life, but to plead for money at some fundraiser. Hypocrites. I'd rather be an idiot hoping to save some woman's life, than to be a fat cat eating a solid gold dinner with the GOP... Got Rage? You might want to try this... Netdisaster.com I visited the GOP website, and I have to say: I feel better already. Atheists for Terri, And Other Righteous Souls Some of the nicest people on this planet came to our little vigil today, as they have many days this past week and a half. A little old man and woman, gimme caps and sneakers, all sweet and gray and docile looking. Looking at them, you'd think, "Southern Baptist, Republican, conventional. I think I'll ask them to direct me to the local John Birch Chapter". Proceed at your own risk - you have been warned... The Mitchells are FLAMING liberals, total atheists and rabid Democrats. Not to mention they have wicked ninja skills. Mess with Mom Mitchell, and she will turn you into dog food; Dad Mitchell will just break you with his mind. They are also completely and totally on Terri's side. The juxtaposition of atheist, liberal and pro-Terri crashes journalists' mental harddrives. It literally drives them insane. Watching Mom Mitchell take apart a reporter is fun. They are not expecting her to go crazy-go-nuts all over them when they assume she's part of the "religious right" simply because she supports Terri Schiavo's right to live. I didn't know grannies knew that kind of language, but there it is. The air literally turns blue, and then Dad hauls out a load of literature and pictures and stuff, and by the time they finish with him, the reporter is just a quivering heap of suppositions. Mom and Dad Mitchell are both just awesome in every way. They simply do not give a rat's bohiney about what other people think they should think. I sit back, look at them, and think to myself: "if I ever turn into a flaming liberal atheist democrat, I want to be just like them." But if you want to see some heads explode, you should have seen what happened when the pro-weed, pro-Terri people showed up on day three... What's interesting is, these people get it. The libertarians and true liberals among us remember that this is actually about the kinds of things the left used to rant about all the time. Remember the "we're all special, we're all okay" mantra of the seventies and eighties? No, of course you don't you bunch of babies. Let's recap for all you whippersnappers out there. There was a time, see, when we used to think that everybody was valuable and everybody has rights and everybody should be allowed to live in peace with their own karma, yada yada yip. Everybody preached that, and then suddenly one day it was no longer cool to be handicapped or disabled or whatever the wahoodie you want to call it. Instead, it was hip to try to figure out how to kill oneself or one's friends whenever you wanted. It was an abrupt turnaround, fueled primarily by the ability to make money off of people stored in nice sterile warehouses. Suddenly, the traditional liberal viewpoint of "live and let live" has been drowned out by the corporate mentality designed to enforce the rules of those who will "live and let die". Pardon me if I fight back. What the heck. I now have enough water to fuel my rage, who need freekin' food anymore? I think Andrew (aka "DJ Quick Silver) said it best today. He's the techno-rave DJ who's pretty popular here in Florida; he just also happens to be quadriplegic. I had to fetch his smoothies today right before he tried to storm the police with his wheelchair and a cup of water. His take: "I have a right to live just as much as you people do". He was incredible today, and he spoke well for all of us - the right and the left, the abled and differently-abled alike. It takes all kinds in this campaign for human rights. Too bad nobody notices the normal people out here just doing their thing everyday. The religious right has their merits, true; but the non-religious left deserves just as much press and praise for being here as any of the rest of these people do. I think I'll take the Mitchells out to dinner when this is all over... Monday, March 28, 2005
In Defense of the Hunger Strike: The Art of Living Extremely There are those of you who wonder just what the **** I'm doing. This is for you. While many of us are busy doing nothing more than viewing life through a monitor all day long, there are a few of us who believe that life lived fully is better than life lived conventionally. For instance: If I wonder what it's like to bungee jump, I do it. If I wonder what it's like to hike into the mountains and live there without anything but what I can carry in a backpack, I do it. If I wonder what it's like to have a child without benefit of medications, I do it. (It's not THAT bad. But then again...) However, there are those among us who are timid, shy, unable to overcome their fear of experiencing pain or exhilaration or humiliation. They are the ones who, in their fear of defeat, never experience victory. They would much rather accept the opinions of experts who will tell them how it feels to bungee jump, or how beautiful the mountains are, or how wonderful it is to be fully aware when a child is born of your body. These people are not to be condemned - they help the world to turn upon it's axis in an orderly fashion, unhindered by the curiousity of exploration. I am not one of those people. Likewise, If I wonder what it's like to be starved and dehydrated to death, and if the experts are telling me that it's just such a marvelous experience, why on earth would I take their word for it? I'm all for authority, but these "experts" have none. They have never thirsted, they have hardly ever hungered, and they aren't going to tell me what it's like if they don't even have a clue. Since they seem so intent upon introducing this into our lives, I think it's a good thing to question authority and just try it out for myself, within reason. So to all those who are jumping bikes off mountain ridges and thrashing on their boards, I salute you. You of all people have a better understanding of the need to experience rather than accept other's opinions on matters. And to those who must accept opinions on matters, but are open to others' experiences, I thank you for reading my accounts. And to all those who think it's funny that some woman is trying to find out if the "authorities" are right on this one, I say - get out from behind your keyboards and question authority. Oh, and one other thing... Isn't it ironic that I've gone for 10 days on nothing but water, Pedialyte and propel, and I haven't had a "potassium imbalance" like Michael Schiavo claimed Terri did? Because surely you know by now, the doctors never did diagnose that as the cause of Terri's collapse. They had to make that diagnosis post facto based Michael Schiavo's accusation that Terri was bulemic. Strange. Question authority. Live extremely. Earthquake In Sumatra - 8.5 Just so you know: news coming out of Singapore is an 8.5 earthquake centered just off Sumatra in Indonesia has racked the place. That magnitude may rise, just like the last one did, and once again, this is a shallow quake. http://earthquake.usgs.gov/eqinthenews/2005/usweax/ Do NOT expect me to point to this and laugh as God condemning the world. I hate the suffering of innocents, and I've spent most of my life trying to ease suffering. I'm not going to laugh at anybody or suggest that God would kill people just because it's a fun thing to do after a weekend off. Pray to God these people head for the hills now. Suffering is suffering, whether it's a woman starving to death in a hospice or a child being swept away in India. If you want to see some wackjob dance and rejoice over someone's death, ask Michael Schiavo's supporters outside hospice, or ask the U.N. rep who stated after the last tsunami that the disaster would help bring down the local populations and restore the earth to it's natural ecological balance. And they say I'M a nut... UPDATE: TSUNAMI WARNING ISSUED From USGS: WARNING... THIS EARTHQUAKE HAS THE POTENTIAL TO GENERATE A WIDELY Hunger Strike - THE BLOG: I'm BACK  I'm finally close to rehydrated - it took three days of doing nothing but drinking water - and I'm mad. I'm tired of being a sweet suffering sister in Jesus. Now I'm a peeved-off suffering sister in Jesus who hasn't eaten in 10 days, and now that my brain is finally working again, I'm ready to rock and roll. The time for mourning is over. No, I'm probably not going to get arrested. I promised the man who paid the money to get me here - my husband - that I would not use his hard-earned dough to buy a degree at Our Lady of the Handcuffs University. I'm still waiting on God to act, and what God does is what God does. It's His field, He can play ball like he wants. But I can tell who's a wussy in this game, and it's not me. I'm doing what I was called to do, and if some sappy chick no-name chick like me can go ten days without food then some freekin' suit in a mansion can get on his phone and call his people to swoop in and take Terri out of here just like they did good ol' Elian Gonzales. Don't like it? Talk to Mr. Special Agent's Glock. Terri is in the throes of death, and I'm on the outside looking in - so it's time to say what needs to be said, without diplomacy or niceties. Goodbye, Passion week; let's rock and roll. Pedialyte = Ulp Pedialyte may be God's gift to dehydrated people, but I think perhaps it would be a better gift if it actually tasted good enough to swallow. Stay away from the clear stuff - it is reminiscent of baby spittooey. I just wanted to warn you. Maybe it's just the ten days of foodless wonder talking, but I'm not a fan. No offense to the Pedialyte people - if it weren't for those guys, I'd be lying in a demented heap on the ground. Not that it's really any different than the state I'm in now... When Writing Dies I have just noticed how wretched and purple my writing has become - not to mention unfun. Blame the hunger strike, plus the extraordinary atmosphere generated when an innocent person is gruesomely starved and dehydrated to death right before your eyes. Anyhow, so sorry - especially to all you fine folks from snuff and porn boards. If you've been with me from the beginning, I'll remind you - you were warned. The process has now reducing my writing skills to rubble, and my ability to type is totally whacked. I mean, I never claimed to be a great writer, but 10 days without food has pretty well sealed the deal. I am fried, and I've been honest about it. This is an experiment designed to let the world know that starving and dehydrating to death is not a painless process. I wish it were a little more upbeat, and I especially wish my ironic sarcastic hateful mode was in full play, because that's when my writing is best. Instead, I get some sort of weepy "look at Terri starving to death" mode, which is not "fun to read". Honestly, when one loves someone, how does one make that death "fun to read"? I can't. It's just not funny here. It's weird, and chaotic, and brutal, and sad - but it's just not funny. I can't make it "fun to read". Great - just when my readership is hitting new heights, I'm starving my brain and taking the worst photos of my life (none were ever any good, so that's no real loss). So be it. Welcome to real people mourning the government-ordered murder of a family member. Welcome to your world. Perhaps we'll all look back on this and laugh. Maybe then, when we're dying holed up in some god-forsaken room starving to death, it will finally be "fun to read"... Sunday, March 27, 2005
Jeb Bush: I Have No Powers Jeb has just plunged every state in the union into a constitutional crisis. According to the Associated Press: Bush told CNN on Sunday that he has done all he can in the case, as he has said for several days. Fine. Never again do I want to see this Governor, or any other Governor for that matter, give pardon or a stay of execution to prisoners. Bob Schindler, Terri's father, came out tonight and told a small group of us that Terri was looking surprisingly good, considering her condition. She still managed to smile through her cracked lips, and she responded positively when he told her about all the people that were here to fight for her right to life. This is a woman who has gone without food for 10 days now - and still she fights on. Terri wants to live. My hunger strike continues; My new handler, Marcy, is making sure that I stay hydrated, and is trying to convince me to rest more. I spend most of my day sitting down now - either in a chair to the side, but more likely in the cool grass where I may rub my bare feet against the green stalks and refresh my soul. Now that I am finally getting back to a hydrated state, I'm finding that the very worst thing about this stage of hunger is the general malaise and weakness of the extremeties, plus hunger pangs and nausea. The crash at the end of the day is swift acting and leaves me exhausted. On to the protests: things were once again heated and emotional today. "Not Dead Yet", the activist organization for the disabled, blocked the road with their wheelchairs. One young man, Zen, got out of his chair and lay down in the road. They became the lead story on most news stations and they were interviewed on MSNBC. Great press regarding civil rights for the disabled... The stations of the Cross were made in great ceremony outside hospice, and one young Orthodox Jewish Man walked silently up and down the sidewalk, his vestments and yarmulka testifying to his fevervent readings as he swayed to an unseen cantor. All around, the textures and rhythms of faiths of all flavors found welcome space on the now-muddy medians of Hospice. The cacophony of voices from all walks of life is at once overwhelming and gratifying, but many of us are wishing to avoid the "circus" atmosphere that so often accompanies protests. One young man was heckling the police, and was asked several times to stop by Terri's supporters - he finally settled down when Bobby Schindler asked him to keep it calm. It is of utmost importance that we remember we are supporting a woman and her family through a very dark time - it doesn't need to be made more stressful than it is by protestors. At the same time, proper protest and civil disobedience can make the difference, especially when it comes to pressuring the Governor. Unfortunately, this Governor is showing that he cannot be trusted; on Wednesday, he said he had the authority to take Terri Schiavo into custody. Today, he said he does not. This means I will never take his word for anything else ever, again. And if I can't trust a man, I can't support him in office... Awaiting A Miracle  The juxtaposition of the suffering of Terri Schiavo and the Week of The Passion is beyond coincidence, and it with greatest hope that I approach this day. Not because I expect life to be perfect, not because I expect the world to be good, but because God is God and nothing shall ever change that. Beyond the Pharisees, beyond the Corrupt Judges, beyond the weak Rulers, there is God. I await God now. Two of our worship leaders - pastors both - got arrested today while attempting to peacefully take a dying woman a drink of water. We shall see what else transpires today. Sometimes, late at night, I look across the beautifully landscaped lawn of Terri's prison and realize just how close we are to her. So close. I wish I could be an angel. I wish I could fly over the fence, above the police dogs, through the walls and into Terri's room, just to give her a little cup of water. But I have this body, rapidly diminishing though it may be, and it will not fly. I can only gaze across the garden, past the fountains flowing with water just outside Terri's window... Christ is Arisen. I await God. The Sun Shall Rise... and the first rays shall shine upon an empty tomb. We are awaiting the sunrise here, as we vigil outside of Terri's deathbed. The courts have turned away, and all that is left is the grace of God. I await the grace of God. Today's hunger strike was filled with the support of friends from all around the vigil. Today was very hot and muggy, and the tensions at Hospice Woodside are running hot. Everyone is extremely upset with Jeb Bush, as well as with his brother George Bush. We had several more peaceful arrests today, and many more who wished to join them. People are coming in from all over, and - regardless of what the press reported - the Schindlers did not ask for everyone to leave the Hospice permanently. Rather, they wanted them to take time to worship with their own families and then return for services later. I do not know why the press reported this so inaccurately. Terri's plight is sad and desperate. The Schindlers say she is approaching her final hours, and their wishes to have Terri receive Easter Communion were denied by the courts, again. Her priest was turned away by the hospice, and she will receive no holy wafer or wine for her last rites... Tennessee Tammy had to go home finally, and I was very sad to see her go. I have a new "handler" Marcy, who is officially responsible for making sure that I am not dead or passed out under a tree somewhere - at least once an hour. I had a very rough morning, followed by a better afternoon, and ended with exhaustion. Nausea and cramping is becoming more common. I believe that a fast that is accompanied by plenty of water might be less painful, but without adequate water, it becomes a painful endeavor. I will post before leaving for Easter Services at the Hospice tomorrow. Pray for Terri, and may God have mercy on all our souls... Saturday, March 26, 2005
Hunger Strike - THE BLOG: The Jackals Descend...  The Hunger Strike continues, and all is not well. I am so tired and frequently weak, and it is probably a good thing, or there would be violence from me toward's Michael Schiavo's supporters. Yesterday the Jackals descended to circle the expected carcass of Terri Schiavo. Of the four or five of them, many were drunk as they swayed, loudly singing songs, dancing while holding signs stating "Terri's Brain Dead" "She's Already Dead" and "Michael's Choice". Most of them are large, young affluent white males; they intimidate and harass the Terri's supporters endlessly. One large blond woman walked by the children holding roses for Terri, breathing expletives and profanities just below earshot of the police, but well within the hearing of the children. They bullied themselves into a position so that Bob and Mary Schindler can see them each time they go in and out of the Hospice. One large man screams at Mary every time she passes by: "It's Michael's Choice" chanting it as if it were his mantra. Mary, visibly ill, is powerless to stop his ridicule, for he is protected by the power of free speech. They laugh amongst themselves, and mock the humanity of Terri, speaking of her as a "liquified brain" and "lower than a jellyfish". According to two of them, they were allowed to go in and ogle the misery of Terri, brought in by Michael himself just recently. They are happy. They are rejoicing in the torturous death of a disabled woman. They are Michael Schiavo's supporters and friends. I am beginning to think that dying by starvation would be better than living with such abusive, adulterous, maniacal, depraved, drunken strands of human waste as these people. If Terri ever did wish she were dead, it is because Michael Schiavo paraded these people through her room so they could speak to her the same way they speak to us - spewing forth the vomit of their drunken minds upon her as she lay in bed, helpless, alone... It is Saturday of Our Lord's Death. Easter is coming. We are awaiting deliverance from evil... Never Give Up - Never Surrender It's the end game for Terri Schiavo, and those of us who have followed Terri Schiavo's case from the very beginning understand the desperation which will accompany this next few hours. Now is the time for Jeb Bush to make his move; now he must act, or he will surely lose us all. I am so tired tonight I will only be able to give you just a short update. According to her father, Terri is in a critical stage, and we are all praying that she just hang in there a little while longer. A little while longer, until someone will act. And they are acting; if they choose to do nothing, they are murdering this woman. If they do what they know is right, they will save Terri. Let's pray to God that Jeb Bush acts in the right and saves Terri... Until they do act, I will man my post until the One who sent me relieves me of my duty. I'm so tired; I'm simply out of energy. I really need to eat - and so does Terri. Please feed her. Please water her. Please save this woman, who has committed no crime... Friday, March 25, 2005
GOOD FRIDAY  The day is blustery and overcast. No announcement yet from the Judge, even though he had promised to expedite the case. We shall go to hospice to wait, and pray, and do what God has led us here to do. Other are not so mild; they are voicing a deep desperation, the urge to save Terri is so strong. The urge to save this nation is so strong. Still, our Caphias, Whittenmore, sits in his chamber while the innocent woman is flogged by her own instincts, her own hunger and thrist. Undoubtedly, the Judge is thinking about what his lunch shall be, for it is nearly noon and he surely must be hungry. The Hunger Strike continues on, and I am now trying to increase my water intake to make up for my week-long mild dehydration. This is the first day I woke up without the constant headache and leg cramps which have plagued me each morning. This is the first time I really realized how hungry I am - the thirst has been overriding most of the pain of the hunger. My stomach cramps, and I have had waves of nausea. The weakness is more pronounced now, but I started out a fairly strong person; I am still walking around the hospice, and I am able to speak and serve as need be. For the first time in my life, I understand the reason for fat. I never realized what a gift these few extra pounds could be when no food is available. I actually thanked God for them; I wish Terri had a few extra pounds, but she is thin and fragile. She does not have the reserve - perhaps they never wanted her to have that reserve for this very reason. Her mother reported last night that Terri's nose and lips are bleeding, her sking peeling, her eyes sunken, her tongue dry and swollen. Her mother leaned over her, and Terri's voice seemed weak and far away. She turned her eyes to her mother and seemed to beg for help, and Mary her mother became ill and wept, for the police in the room will not let her even touch Terri's skin with a wet cool cloth. She looked, her mother said, like a victim of Auschwitz. It is true - Terri is in Auschwitz. Heil Death, and welcome to your new Reich... Who are these people who say this is painless? Have any of them denied themselves food and water? Or is it possible that they lie to fool us, a nation that has so lost touch with hunger and thirst that we no longer even know what it is? I feel guilty for taking the water I need when Terri is being denied even a chip of ice. Jesus was offered vinegar by his tormentors; who will offer Terri even this small bit of fluid? And yet, this song is ever with me, so strong I can hear it a still moments: Surely it is God who saves me - I will trust in Him and not be afraid, For the Lord is my stronghold and my sure defense, and He will be my Savior... Hunger Strike - THE BLOG: And So We Are Betrayed Nothing more. The rain is coming down outside now, and the lightning flashes. Today at hospice we were visited by nurses from Hospice and by friends of Michael Schiavo. They descended upon us on one little corner, twenty or so of them just before news time. To one protestor a man shouted "We have you surrounded, and we are going to pound you." She retreated quickly, believing this to be a threat. They rushed past the beautiful Heather Demian in her wheelchair, and one protestor screamed at her until tremors seized her arms. Weeping, she told him that this was a civil rights issue, that this was a women's right issue, but - having succeeded at making a terminally ill young woman weep and become ill - the man now turned his back on her as if she were nothing more than a tree stump. His noble work was done. Another Michael Schiavo supporter cried "F*** Terri" and yet another "this is Michael's choice". Their enlightened cries filled the area, disturbing the dying who lay in their rooms, filling the area with profanity and shrieks of loathing for Terri Schiavo, and indeed for any living being that does not please them. I turned back to Heather, whose arms were still jerking willy-nilly, and stroked her back to try to calm her. Then I hid my face in the white cotton sleeve of my blouse and wept to think that these people were crying out for their Barabbas, when Christ had been offered to them. I wept, but the tears were few, because of my thirst. I wept, and non could comfort me. We are betrayed. The day has come. It is Good Friday, and the world has gone dark. Thursday, March 24, 2005
Hunger Strike - THE BLOG: The Ugly Truth  The ugly truth is, makeup doesn't makeup for starving and dehydrating one's body. The ugly truth is, one cannot hide torture behind the guise of mercy. The ugly truth is, one cannot tell a lie and then make it truth. This is the ugly truth. We're heading out to hospice this mourning, on the day of Jesus' betrayal. We shall see if we are about to be betrayed by all those standing in the judicial crowd shouting crucify, crucify... Terri is being crucified on a cross of gold. She is being crucified so she may serve as the gateway of all the others who will follow her into the clean, white, profitable slaughterhouses. She and all the others will enter an Auschwitz with landscaping and pretty flowers, and they will die. Meanwhile the eugenically superior and perfect people will stroll by, eating and drinking outside the doors. But they will not be unaware of the ugly truth. The ugly truth is, this is murder. Another Late Night, No Relief in Sight, and Yet -  What a wretched day, and yet it had such moments of hope that it carries us through tonight until tomorrow. I cannot describe how tense we all are... several shouting matches have erupted between the few three or four Michael Schiavo supporters that show up, and the Terri supporters. Some people are arriving already in tears, calling for radical reform of the judicial branch. We had several arrest today, including the disgraceful handcuffing of a small boy who only offered water to Terri Schiavo. A youth group with perhaps thirty teens just showed up today. People are literally showing up drawn as if by some unheard song. We all just want one thing - we want to save Terri from the enforced death of the disabled, the starvation of the innocents. I am not doing too well tonight; I will have to start drinking more water if I intend to do the entire hunger strike day for day with Terri. I am so tired, and my whole body hurts. I feel like I've drunk enough, but it's just not as much as I now need. I'm dehydrated, and the others are warning me I have to hydrate more or I'll die. I think I'll try to drink a whole bottle of water tonight, to prepare myself for the struggle to come. I am just so so tired, and the lack of food and water make it terribly hard to sleep. If I can't sleep, then I know by logical succession that Terri is not"resting comfortably" at all. I have included a profile picture of me for comparison of my usual self. As you can see, I'm not looking too good. I'm also not feeling too good. It shows. This is not a humane process. I can't believe that by tomorrow evening, it will have been one week since I ate, and I certainly can't believe that any human being would ever force this torture on anyone. A Michael Schiavo supporter today told me I was just wasting my time, Terri was a vegetable that would soon be dead. I told him this is not a waste of time - it is showing the world the truth about starvation and dehydration deaths. Let them try to lie now. The truth will be known. Wednesday, March 23, 2005
Update from Hospice - Terri's Priest & Parents Turned Away From Room. (phoned in from Becki Snow live at the Hospice.) FLASH: Bob & Mary Schindler and Terri's Priest were turned away from seeing Terri this evening. They were stopped at the gate and turned back, just minutes ago. No explanation given. An unconfirmed report says that Deborah Bushnell, George Felos, and Michael Schiavo are in the hospice now. George Felos, in his new conference today, has threatened to charge anyone who tries to help Terri with felony assault. This is clearly out of his jurisdiction. Once again, Felos insolence as past chairman of the board of the Hospice, is dominating the Hospice policies. Awaiting word from Talahassee to see if DCF will intervene to save Terri Schiavo under executive order from Governor Jeb Bush. Hunger Strike Update: dehydration more insidious today, I have to take more water than I can handle because my stomach has shrunk so much since the hunger strike has began. Terri Schiavo Update: Terri Schiavo is also dehydrating faster now: her lips are bleeding and cracking now. There is no time to spare. We are awaiting a miracle. UPDATE.....(few minutes ago) Terri's parents were admitted into the hospice for a few minutes and left with their heads hung low..... Will No One Hear Our Plea?  The 11th circuit court of appeals has rejected our plea for leniency. Is there no one left in our judicial system who will spare the life of a woman who has committed no crime but to be disabled in a society hell bent on perfection? I am not in very good shape right now; I'm becoming nauseated easily and my legs are cramping. I feel pretty weak. If I could share Terri's burden with her I would, but the only thing that I can do is to walk with her, carrying my own burden down the last mile - spiritually hand in hand with my sister in suffering. She will not know I am here; but regardless of whether or not anyone ever knows, I will still walk this last mile with Terri. I will do it because someone must tell the tale of the suffering, someone must understand. Someone who has a voice must speak to the world of the of suffering of Terri Schiavo... Tonight, I took the Holy Communion. It will not break the hunger strike to take the crumb of wafer and the teaspoon of wine that represents the Body and Blood of Christ. It gave me strength, and I will now use that strength to do what God sent me to do. God is still God, and Terri Schiavo is still Terri Schiavo. Neither life, nor death, nor anything that man can do can ever erase that. No one can ever erase what Terri is, was, or will be. And no one can ever image what God (who is still God) can do... I will wait upon God. I will wait for Him. Tuesday, March 22, 2005
Hunger Strike - THE BLOG: Live From Hospice I've stepped in to blog from The Illustrious Nikki's beautiful Florida condo for a minute, before heading back out to the Hospice. Here's the story... The crowd is really getting energized here. More people today than before, and a very good group. "Not Dead Yet" , a militant disabled rights organization, has been very vocal today. Once of the Women got arrested for walking up and trying to take water to Terri. She was treated relatively well by the police, but it still seems so wrong to arrest a person for taking water to a dying woman. It IS wrong. Lots of singing going on now, and we are doing the best we can under the circumstances. Yet another day of this woman's life was wasted by the Judicial system. This is the second whole day that she has spent while the courts who were supposed to be reviewing the case have deliberately dragged their feet. They did NOTHING at the 11th court of appeals today, despite the fact that they received the papers before court opened this morning. DCF is opening its records to the court tomorrow at 10:45 AM. Let's pray that someone, somewhere, will stand up for the rights of the disabled to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness... As for the Hunger Strike: According to http://www.rehydrate.org, I am now displaying the symptoms of mild to moderate dehydration. I'm trying to avoid the severe dehydration, because I really don't want heart failure to show up in the middle of a candlelight vigil. It would not be cool. I think I'll make sure to drink a little extra water before I go back out tonight, so my children will still have a mother, my mother will still have her daughter, and my husband won't come to Florida and forcibly take me home - which is what he was threating to do tonight if I didn't be more careful. Ah, well... What is so sad is that, according to Terri's Priest, the symptoms he described indicate that Terri is now in the moderate to severe dehydration phase. This is brutal; it's torture; it's abuse. No one who is reading this should ever doubt that this is a painful process. I can tell you that, even if Terri can't... From Rehydrate.org:
Symptoms of moderate to severe dehydration include: -low blood pressure -fainting -severe muscle contractions in the arms, legs, stomach, and back -convulsions -a bloated stomach -heart failure -sunken fontanelle - soft spot on a infants head -sunken dry eyes, with few or no tears -skin loses its firmness and looks wrinkled -lack of elasticity of the skin (when a bit of skin lifted up stays folded and takes a long time to go back to its normal position) -rapid and deep breathing - faster than normal -fast, weak pulse
 This not an attractive picture. This is not how I would wish to be shown to the world, with no makeup, haggard, dessicating; but you deserve to see what the Judges are doing to us. Every time they make a ruling against Terri, they are damaging her body more and more dramatically. In turn, they are damaging me. I cannot fully hydrate as long as Terri is suffering, and you deserve to see what they are doing to Terri behind closed doors. They thnk they can hide this evil. It's even worse in there for Terri, but perhaps I can shed a little light on this version of murder. It is not painless. It is torture. Hunger Strike - THE BLOG: On To Atlanta This Judge BURNED an ENTIRE DAY off Terri's life. There is no WAY that this could be justified. He knew what his ruling would be, and he took ONE DAY away from this woman's life. I hope everyone understands the gravity of this situation, and I hope that the Judiciary is condemned for violating the rights of the disabled in America. They are deliberately murdering a disabled woman. We are going back to Hospice immediately. We finally got some sleep last night, but overslept. Now we are needed more than ever. I put out this plea to you. If you ever cared about civil rights, if you ever cared for the dignity of man, if you EVER ONCE considered yourself to be Christian and if there's any way you can - Come to the Hospice of the Florida Suncoast, Hospice Woodside; 66th and 102nd St., Pinellas Park. WE NEED YOU NOW. HUNGER STRIKE: I'm still hanging in there. My cognitive function seems to be a little better today than yesterday, so I'm going to keep up the magnesium suppliment, (magnisium sulfate in mineral water) and I finally dissolved a vitamin in some water so I could take it without getting nauseated. I still feel lousy. Here's the scoop: it's not the starving to death that's the worst thing, and it's not the thing that kills you. It's the DEHYDRATION that is the torture. They take away the body's ability to hydrate itself, and it's an absolute hell. Fasters who keep fully hydrated or who drink juices should not experience the kinds of pains and symptoms that I am experiencing. Dehydration is not painless. This is not painless. The Experts who say it is are lying murderers. I'm off to get ready to go to Hospice. I will log in later. Pray for Terri. Hunger Strike - THE BLOG: That's It, I've Lost My Mind My Handler, Tammy "The Rage of God" Melton says my cognitive function has become more of a malfunction. I'm not exactly a wasted skeleton, but my mind is turning to mush. I'm rambling in my conversations more, and I am forgetting what I'm talking about in mid-subject. I'm losing my speech inhibition; I'm starting to blur the line between the private conversation in my head and the public conversation I have with others. I even used a bad word tonight that I hardly ever use, but fortunately I was just talking to Tammy instead of talking to the press, so that was good. I'm pretty sure this is related to dehydration, but it's not inconceivable that I have a magnesium deficiency, since I don't ususally get enough anyway due to dietary restrictions. I'll add a little magnesium citrate or something like it to my water so I don't have a bigger problem with it later. Terr Schiavo's ruling has STILL not come through. This is wasting precious time, and everybody at the vigil is quite upset. I can only pray that the judge will rule in Terri's favor, or else rule quickly against her so we may appeal to the higher court... Monday, March 21, 2005
 Terri and I are now entering our fifth day without food, me with diminished water, and her completely without water. This is so cruel to have to wait so long for the judge. Notice the hollows now on my cheeks, and more fine lines. But at least I have a little water. Terri has none. Her lips are now starting to crack, her eyes are dry, and her mucous membranes are starting to severely dehydrate. I was noticing today how dry and itchy my skin was... but no lotion for me. What if there is no one who will help put lotion on Terri's skin? Hunger Strike - THE BLOG: Waiting on the Judge with Sean Hannity Well, we're going back to the Hospice to provide moral support for the Schindlers and Sean Hannity. I'll check in to tell you all about it when I get back, which may be late, but hey. Wait up with me... My tongue is now completely WHITE? What on earth is up with THAT? I suppose anemia is setting in??  Here I am, Miss Death On A Cracker. Notice the lovely dark circles under my eyes, not to mention the fine lines that come with not drinking enough water. Wow, what a difference being fully hydrated makes in the way we look. You want to see what Terri looks like? Don't ask the experts, they're not a 42 year old woman who's being starved to death. Ask me. This is me, a 42 year old woman who has not had a meal since St. Patrick's day or a bite of any kind of food - liquified or otherwise - since March 18, 2005. This is a woman who has not had enough water, but at least I've had enough to sustain my body - which is more than Terri is getting - and it's still damaging me. This is what starvation and dehydration does to a woman my age. This is what the doctors are doing to Terri Schiavo. This is not humane. Hunger Strike - WAITING FOR TUBE So many things to blog, so little time. Have not yet gotten the update from Michael Schiavo's Lawn vigil; will do so as soon as I talk to my contact. Sat around all night trying to get a law passed, trying to get a court ruling, trying to not fall down flat on my face in a concrete parking lot from hunger. Oh yeah, and trying to find internet access. Why oh why is there no Wifi in the hospice parking lot??? Why did they not anticipate my every blogging need. On to Terri; she's still waiting. We have a court hearing this afternoon - a Clinton appointee by the name of James Whittemore, U.S. District J in Tampa FL. Seems to be all over the map ruling wise - we should have some people going to the court today, but I'm just not going to be physically able to do it. I'm going to Hospice Woodside and stand vigil with the woman on the other side of the wall, the other woman who has not eaten since Friday morning. I will be praying for Terri from the trodden-down grass outside the hospice, waiting for the courts to give us both the reprieve we so desperately want. This is the first time I've thought, if I really screw this up, I could die. I got pretty sick yesterday afternoon. It took me by surprise; suddenly I was just weak, and I really thought I was going to faint. I kept thinking "if I fall forward, I'll break my nose on this concrete - if I fall backwards, I'll hit my head and knock myself unconscious. Fall to the side, body!" Fortunately, I did neither. I collapsed under bush on the backside of hospice and had Tennessee Tammy go fetch the precious water bottle of life, wherein the emergency vitamin water is stored. I felt really, really bad. Kinda like a wet noodle with no wet. Just noodle. But hey, I got my first real leg cramps this morning. Woo-hoo. Ow, ow, my foot is going now, and I HATE foot cramps. This is related to minerals, or calcium. Limbs are starting to go numb sporadically, which is a lot of fun when your walking or having an interview with the press. We did have a couple, and Guabe Garcia, the D.C. attorney who was my other Hunger Striker, was most excellent with the press. He was great at explaining his reasons for opposing the execution of Terri Schiavo, and I was sorry had to go home last night. He is a real fire-cracker, and was up all night with us. But he did look a little under the weather himself. He had finally started to really feel that sort of visceral hunger that can only be fathomed after a few days without food. For instance: smelling food is like getting hit in the face with it. It's a completely different experience when you're truly starving; I think my sense of smell has been heightened. Still thirsty, but I'm still drinking water. I must need more, but I just can't quite bring myself to really get hydrated when Terri won't get anything yet. I don't know how she stands it, I really don't. Oh, and don't tell me "it's okay, they give her morphine" - they are making her die of starvation and dehydration, but it's okay because they'll deaden the pain with a little morphine? This is HUMANE? We stayed out til' five in the morning, when the press finally told us there would be no ruling yet. We were completely exhausted, and I was barely able to crawl into my sleeping bag. Thank God for friends who extend their hospitality to us. It was so cold for Florida last night. I'm going back out to vigil in a little while. I did add a teaspoon of sugar to some water this morning; I crawled out of bed and I realized I might have just damaged my body with this Hunger Strike, and it's not a good feeling. I don't want to die. I don't have a choice about not wanting to die - the body's messages and will to live is so overpowering, when our physical nature is given the chance, the will to live overrides all. I pray to God that the Court will give Terri the right to eat again, to drink again. I know that it is hurting me to go without food, and I know it is even worse for her to go without both food and water altogether. It is wrong to starve a being to death. It is a medical fact that Terri's body is suffering now. We are entering the critical period, where our bodies are cannabalizing themselves in a desperate attempt to stay alive. Her will to live is overriding all other signals now, and she would take food and water - nutrition and hydration - from anyone who would offer her some... if only they would. Sunday, March 20, 2005
Hunger Strike - MIDNIGHT PRAYER VIGIL! I'm going to a midnight prayer vigil at Hospice to pray for Congress, that they may vote wisely and with their hearts. My poor hubby; he has been reading my blog, and he's scared to death I'm going to up and dry up. He practically ordered me to eat; no use. Ha ha, I'm in Florida, so he can't make me do anything. Tammy sez we must away to the vigil. My handler is going to make sure I don't die while praying for Terri. She's a ninja and she's down with a bow staff so no starvations are gonna whup up on me. HA! Hunger Strike - DRUDGE AUDIO - Terri Responds to Her Father Find Drudge on your radio... http://www.drudgereport.com/affils.txt If you want to hear an audio clip of Terri allegedy responding to her father after her feeding tube was removed. It's supposed to be extremely moving - she responds to her father, not with words, but with coos and moans. If we insist that all spoken responses be "words"in our definition of response, then we have truly sunk to the lowest levels. It's amazing that ANYONE has the gall to the call Terri a vegetable. Vegetables don't cry when you ask them if their back hurts... Speaking of hurting, I'm still waiting for the euphoria that the experts say is supposed to accompany this starvation and dehydration of which we speak. Ya know, I'm beginning to suspect that the expects are WRONG. I'm beginning to worry about shock; I'm not sure what to look for with the effects of dehydration/hunger shock, so I'm making sure to stay hydrated as much as is ethical on a hunger strike. I find that the effects of not eating for approximately three days are painful and rather weird. I wish I was more able to explain: weakness, general internal pain (now through the entire abdominal cavity).I'm really surprised at the worrisome behavior of my heart; there is a complicated "depressed", slightly burning feeling throughout the chest cavity. I'm trying to be very careful - and yet I am inspired by other hunger strikers for Terri that are here. One that I have met is a 26-yr-old pro-life attorney from Washington DC. He started at exactly the same time that I did, with the same motivations; his family has many members in the medical profession, and other than taking a quart of Pedialyte a day, he seems to be hanging in there. My "Propel" has about the same make-up as Pedialyte, but it only has 15 calories per 20 ounces. I'll have to be watchful about this; this is really a crash diet for sure. The specter of hunger and thirst hangs over everything like an oppressive cloud of diffuse pain. The company of others is beginning to diminish - even their conversations are suffused with the everpresent voice of the body, calling for food and water. I hate this Hunger Strike. I hate it. It hurts. I hate the fact that Terri Schiavo has to go through this, without even the comfort of a sip of water. I hate the fact that anyone would think this is painless. I hate that Doctors will do this to people and call it merciful. This is insane. This is brutal. This is evil. Terri's Infected After Improper Feeding Tube Removal At last report, Terri is feverish, having contracted an infection at the site where her feeding tube site was not sutured but just LEFT OPEN. At this time, Hospice is refusing to give her "comfort care" for her infection, denying antibiotics or treatments in ADDITION to denying this woman food and water. Do this to an animal - cage it up, cut it, infect it, and allow it to die without food and water - and you'll go to jail. I think you'll go to hell, too. Now, if you'll go to jail (and to hell) for doing this to a dog, why would you be allowed do this to a woman? WHY? MESSAGE FROM TERRI'S FATHER: GO TO TALLAHASSEE! A plea from Terri's father, Bob Schindler: meet us in Tallahassee: March 20, 2005 -TONIGHT! 7:30 PM at the Governor's Mansion for a candelight vigil March 21, 2005 - TOMORROW MORNING! 9:00 AM In front of the Florida Legislature (Capitol) He jsut came out to ask for volunteers to go and make their case in the Florida Capitol. You can help too - just meet our people there. At this point, I am getting too weak and punchy to go. My handler - Tammy - has said that she doesn't want to call my husband and tell him I'm dead in a hotel in Tallahassee. She thinks the bus trip might kill me - HA! The lack of food and water is going to kill me. So there. If Terri feels as bad as I do, I know that this is torture. And Terri, God help her, doesn't even get the sip of water I get. She has to be really feeling it by now, and that's just inhumane. This is only going to get worse, for both of us... Hunger Strike - THE BLOG: Live From Hospice Woodside First: where's my freekin' "starvation euphoria" they PROMISED me? These so-called experts have NO CLUE about this process - they've never done it to themselves, or they'd know that this hurts like a monkey chewing my innards ALL THE TIME. The dehydration isn't exactly a picnic either. The specifics? My vision is getting blurrier. My co-ordination is getting a little off. And not to be a whiner, but my headache is still here and has now been joined by it's little friend, dryness. Drier skin, drier lips, drier everything. Don't make me go into details. Suffice it to say, this is not "drifting off to sleep". This is more like "getting kicked in the stomache to sleep". Awwwww, sounds so peaceful doesn't it? Especially uplifting are the abdominal pains, which are still sporadic and now more intense. It's a real hoot. Feels like clothespins and my intestine is the clothesline. Ow. I want my EUPHORIA, you expert liars. My train of thought just got derailed. Ah, back on track again. I'm seriously in need of some food, and none is forthcoming. We have just heard that a few choice Congressmen have decided Terri doesn't need any help, and they couldn't come to unanimous decision in the Federal House. Hahaha, they are getting called back to session at MIDNIGHT tonight so they can try again. Nice work, losers. Get it right this time. But so many thanks to those in the house who DID get it right. No real arrests so far at the hospice vigil today; we do have guitars strumming, pets, violin music, the occasional peaceful song and a few others of us who are wearing black armbands to denote we are on hunger strike - in solidarity with Terri, who has no choice but to go without food and water. Expect to see more errors in my writing, and possibly a little personality change coming. I'm still only taking one ounce of water an hour, and my kidneys have rewarded me with an example of concentrated output. What a lovely, lovely color. I'll be posting later this afternoon. Pictures should be coming tonight - I'm getting ahold of someone's sweet machine and will have an update from MICHAEL SCHIAVO'S LAWN vigil. Yes. The protestors will hold a candelight vigil for his poor, dying wife Terri. I'm sure he'll be touched... This Is So Not Cool: Heart Skipping Beats While Mind Skips Track Maybe this is what they are calling starvation induced "euphoria" - my heart is going skippy skippy, and my head isn't too clear. I'm having a few "blank spots" in my thinking process. That's probably a blood sugar problem. The skippy skippy problem I've had before when I didn't eat properly, so I won't freak on it unless I get that thing where my heart stops. Live dangerously, hey? I'm going down to check on the protests outside of hospice to see if we have a church service or something. Back in a skippy skippy... Hunger Strike: LIVE FROM TERRI'S HOSPICE Here with Tammy and Nikki, blogging live from the belly of the Beast so go speak. No camera yet, since I can't seem to get the Lappy fired up in a wi-fi zone. I will get a few photos uploaded later. First off I want to say: THERE IS NO EUPHORIA WITH STARVATION SO FAR. Read my dry lips: NO EUPHORIA. And on that note: No food for Terri or me since Friday 1:45 PM eastern. No water for Terri. I finally had three ounces of water yesterday around noon, while in route to Florida. I've had 30 ounces of mineral water/no calorie gatorade (for the salt) since then and I feel like I'm a sot for having anything while Terri goes without. I'm going to have one ounce per hour and that's all - it will be harder today because I'm going to be way more active. Once again, I have a wicked headache. I don't quite know how to say it, but there's a "crackly" feeling. I was sleeping on a borrowed floor last night, and I have discovered that rolling over now produces a "cellophane" sound in my soft tissues. Interesting, and a little disturbing. This sound is not to be confused with the "ow, ow" my body is making when I figured out sleeping on the floor is not as comfy as it used to be. Life without food and water is hard. Everyone else eats, but I cannot. I want something so bad - it's like I'm crying out for help inside, and no one can hear me. I can feel my insides starting to draw up, like it's being pulled up by and invisible hand. The ketosis is far more pronounced today. Everything smells acidic - everything feels a little painful. Only a few days, and I'm already feeling bad. It's like one of those dreams where the people come, and they stare at me, but no one will help while I'm been fangoriously devoured by some evil monster. In this case, the monster is hunger and thirst, and no one is ignoring me. People are constantly asking me if I want to break fast, and no one would condemn me. But no one is asking Terri if she want to eat or drink... People say they cannot hear or understand her answer. But the lack of outer voice does not stop the inner voice from crying out in fear, or hunger, or thirst. The lack of a physical voice does not stop the voice of the spirit from crying out, "Help me". Those cries - are they really just reflexes, as her doctors just want us to believe? They also say her tears are just reflexes. It's all nothing - ignore her. In those dreams, does Terri cry out, and no one will help? My first sip of water, after only 23 hours, was indescribable. The flight attendant offered me water, and she handed me a tiny cup. I suppose I looked thirsty, and she offered me a cool cup of water. I dipped my finger in the cup for a minute and just thought about how I could refuse this precious liquid life, if I could just hold out a little longer. I could not refuse this little bit of water any longer. God forgive me, I could not go any farther voluntarily. There is no ecstacy in dehydration. There is no euphoria in starvation. Anyone who tells you otherwise is a liar beyond all words. Just ask me. Just ask Terri... My rules: try to have no more than one ounce of water per hour. I finally found some mineral water, so I'm going to forgo the gatorade because it might give me an edge I wouldn't have otherwise. I will only have more water minimally if I absolutely have to, or can stand it no longer. But this I swear: no food for until Terri has food, or dies. I'll log in and post after the Palm Sunday services: things promise to get interesting here. Already, we've had an arrest for one person peacefully approaching the hospice asking to bring Terri water and food. We'll see how things develop today. It's going to be a bumpy ride... Saturday, March 19, 2005
An update from the Road to Terri's Vigil. Right now, an hour outside of St. Petersburg / Tampa Bay. In the words of Tennessee Tammy, "You look like Death on a Cracker." So far no food, limited one ounce of liquid per hour mostly "no calorie" gatorade. Hunger not an issue, getting by with the gatorade and a little water. Spent half and hour outside a waffle house while Tennessee Tammy did her share of the eating for the trip to Terri's vigil. Terri's vigil must be working, All the hotels and motels are booked up around the hospice. She will be going in; on the ground level like the last time. More updates, to follow, from her loving husband. Update on Becki's Hunger Strike: She consumed some water (around 3 oz) about 23 hours into the ordeal and then a little Gatorade. Her head hurts and she's super tired but she doesn't know if it's because she's not eaten or because she didn't sleep, preparing to catch her flight to Atlanta. She's still hanging in there and vows not to eat until Terri does, or until Terri passes. What's with the "she"? This is written, not in the third-person but by a third person. Second person? I was trying to be clever there and it didn't work. I'm Becki's friend Jacque, aka Jacque from Texas. Becki and I live 20 minutes from eachother but met in Florida in 2003 at Terri's vigil. My blog is Hi, How YOU Doin'? I'm also on Terri's blog roll. SHAMELESS PLUG FOR ME- Please visit my blog to find out how we Dallas folk that felt we were supposed to stay here are supporting Terri. Candlelight Vigil- Tonight in Dallas. Okay, I'm done. I'm keeping close tabs on Becki so email me if you need further updates. jacquefromtexas@yahoo.com Keep on keeping on with the prayer. Today is the 19th and 19 is the Biblical number for faith. We got to beleive for Terri's redemption from this. Hunger Strikes Aren't Much Fun  So now I finally figure it out: I should have signed on for the "Hula Hoopers for Terri" or the "Guitar Strummers for Terri". I pretty positive that Terri would much rather be doing anything than what she is doing now. But no matter; this will be something I guarantee you neither Terri nor I ever want to do again. Especially without water or any kind of liquid. My head is starting to hurt; this is a drawn, angled kind of pain that transverses the head from side to side. I think that can be attributed to a lack of water. It's been twelve hours now without liquids or foods of any kind, and while I can honestly say that this is not the worst pain I've ever had (that would be the first baby, no meds, and a giant pair of mid-forceps, thank you) I will say that this is uncomfortable. Now the body starts to remind me every few minutes: time to look for a watering hole. Time to take down a buffalo, or at least a squirrel. Look for shelter! The body figures: maybe I just forgot to eat and drink. Well, well, look who's getting old-timer's disease. Let's remind her: HUNGRY! THIRSTY! I don't think it will be easy to sleep tonight. But the morning comes early, and I have a plane to catch. I'm going to "go dark" for a while here, and I'll catch you tomorrow morning, about 4:45 for a post before boarding to Atlanta... I'll post from the Airport, then from there the illustrious Tennessee Tammy will retrieve me to the side of Terri. Time for some serious prayer. Pray for Terri, people. I know you are out there - please pray, believing that God put us here so we could fight this evil. This is our time... Friday, March 18, 2005
KETOSIS HAS BEEN ACHIEVED! Somewhere, an Atkins diet fan is secretly happy for me, then feels guilty that it has happened under such dark circumstances. I actually thought this might be a little early for ketosis - not quite 30 hours since I last ate a meal ( I had some pork rinds this morning). Perhaps the lack of water speeds things up. Now I notice I'm hungry. A little light-headedness is setting in as well.. It's a good thing for Terri she's lying down while having to endure this. Getting dizzy isn't quite cool, and I have noticed that life without Caffeine is not as buzzed as it might be otherwise. I might have to drink some water at the 24 hour mark tomorrow if this keeps up. I'm going to try to make it all the way through the Atlanta Airport tomorrow before I take a drink. I want to experience the kind of rush it must be to have a bunch of people drinking drinks around oneself while oneself is drying to death. It should be a load of fun. I feel for Terri. She's just now starting to really feel it - and I am starting to real feel the pain of this "painless" torture... Hunger Strike - THE BLOG: Okay, My Tummy Growled At Me...  and I don't like it's attitude. I've got to pack to go to Florida. If I'm going to blog the revolution I better get ready. Let's see - first off. I don't have to worry about snacks. No prob. But what's a road trip without beef jerky? Well, Maybe I'm Just a TAD Bit Thirsty Now This is the first time I've really noticed my throat getting that "dusty" feeling. The most noticable effect is really the way I'd like to take a sip anytime someone else's drink is around. Hunger isn't really an issue yet, and I really don't expect it to be one until tomorrow morning. Then it will have been over twenty four hours. My skin does feel like it's loosing a little bit of elasticity. Perhaps I should make sure not to pull on it too much, it might stay that way. Ewwwww. I hope that Terri's parents and siblings are able to give her some comfort in all this. I've noticed that as I start off, the company of other people is enough to keep my mind off the thirst and hunger some. I wonder if that will be enough later? THAT'S IT - I'M GOING TO FLORIDA Inside all day, I've been thinking - "Somebody do something! Somebody save Terri! " God just heard me, and He told my husband that I am Somebody. Whereupon my husband came home and told me that he believes that even though he hates this hunger strike, and even though he hates me being gone, (and traveling is not exactly cheap as free) he's sending me to Florida. I was praying about it, and so was he. Now we get the word, and I'm going to Florida. I'll be posting some more tonight as I continue the Hunger Strike here at home. Then tomorrow, I'm taking a 6 AM flight to Atlanta and from there hitch a ride to Terri's front door at the Hospice of the Florida Suncoast. No goodies or Big Gulps (TM) on the road? What sort of road trip is that??? I will continue the hunger strike in Florida, in front of the Hospice, and I'll live - blog the whole thing from start to finish. What EVER that finish may be... But I am reminded of one thing. God has never failed me yet. I would not go did I not believe that God will do something to save Terri - after all, God is Somebody too. I'm going to Florida. Who's with me? Hunger Strike: Contrast and Compare  Okay, here's a "marker" picture for later comparison... approximately five hours after the hunger strike started. I think I'm looking a little more tired than usual, but maybe that's just old age catching up with me. I could definitely use some lip balm. And some water. Now, here's where I think age does start to factor in: I'm 42, just one year older than Terri. I drink a lot more water than I used to, just so I can feel healthy and "glow", um, or maybe just barely look less haggard. But no matter how I slice it, it's going to affect me more now to go without water than it did when I was 22. This may produce some very dramatic effects in my appearance, and it will NOT be flattering. But if I can personify the process of dehydration for you in a way that reveals the lie of "painless" dehydration, then perhaps it will be worth it. If it helps save Terri's life somehow, then it is worth it. No, I'm Not Going to Tell You How Much I Weigh Just For The Sake Of Science It's not like I'm dead yet. I'll tell you how tall I am - I'm five feet tall. If I get any taller or shorter I'll let you know. On the other hand, if you DO hear me mention my weight, send in the medics because it means I'm seriously out of my mind and approaching the end... So far, so not so bad. This is well within my normal range to go without food, although I haven't really had a meal since last evening. This is starting to be the limit of how long I normally go without water, however - I usually have a drink every couple of hours or so - even more if I am out working in the field or something. I am starting to think of getting a sip every time I turn around. Thirsty More Than Hungry I wonder if it will stay this way all the way through. The thirst isn't particularly awful yet, because I made sure to hydrate myself well prior to this little experiment in pain. To be certain, as soon as I heard the news that they were going ahead with Terri's execution, I drank what was left in my water glass then proceded to dump out all aforementioned drinks so I wouldn't be tempted by them anymore. I'm fairly certain that this is a pretty stupid thing to do to my body. I would not suggest this as a means of humane death for anyone, already. I want a Big Gulp with a Lime Diet Coke. Right now would be good. I wonder what Terri Schiavo dreams about when she's thirsty. I wonder what kind of cool drink she dreams of... Hunger Strike Stats - BLOOD PRESSURE: 133/79, PULSE 85  I know, it's pretty high for me, on both sides. I'm usually a 90/50 kind of girl, and my pulse is usually closer to 65 or so. I think it's high because I'm a little upset right now. Note to self: don't watch the news and take blood pressure at the same time... The machine I'm using is one of the little "wrist rockets" but it's been calibrated recently so it should be more or less accurate. Hunger Strike Stats - TEMP: Slightly Elevated  Okay, now for a little scientific explaination as to my slight discomfort. My temperature started out at a balmy 98.4 this morning; it is now up to 99.2. According to what I've heard about dehydration, this may be normal - but so early? I think part of this is because I'm wandering around between posts, griping about the idiocy of mankind in general right now. This is not a good day for one if one are a firm believer in protecting innocent life. Jessica Lundsford Case Turns for Worse. For those who have been following the live feed from Tampa Bay 10, you have heard that Jessica's across-the-street neighbor has now admitted to assaulting and killing the little girl. How horrible, how sad... A prayer for the little girl and her family. No innocent deserves to be killed. That Black Thing On the Bed Is A Disabled Kitty  His poor leg is all bummed up right now from running around and playing at night. It's all his fault for making poor decisions. He's only been able to lie in bed, and he's not able to go out for now, so his quality of life is WAAAY down. But I'm STILL not going to starve him to death or withhold his water. Me, on the other hand, is getting a little thirsty. His bowl of water is starting to look mighty fine right now. Mmmmmmm... kitty water... Hmmmm... Dry Lips Already  Now here's something I hadn't expected. I'm not sure if Terri's being allowed lipbalm - one doctor said yes, others have said no. Should I or shouldn't I? To balm, or not to balm? No balm for now. This may be just as bad as the caffeine thing. I LOVE balm. But if my lips get dry, it's one of the first ways to tell the effects of dehydration. Lovely. IF TERRI RECEIVED COMMUNION AS FELOS SAID - DID SHE SWALLOW IT? Hey, did anyone else notice that Felos said that Terri received last rites? And did he actually say that she received communion? If so, I believe that the Host (wafer) can only be delivered by mouth - placed on the tongue - and swallowed. Did she just prove that she can eat by mouth? So - they are refusing to feed a woman who can EAT BY MOUTH? They are withholding food and water from a woman who doesn't need a feeding tube to stay alive! Popcorn, anyone? My mother, bless her heart, just came in with a little bowl of popcorn and wanted to know if I'd like some. I had to tell her I'm on hungerstrike and she was like "mmmmmmm, more for me." Rats. I love popcorn. But Terri can't have any goodies, so neither can I. My little six-year-old son is really upset. He has been praying about Terri, and he is already upset that she is being starved. (Before you go bonkers thinking of how I'm indoctrinating my son, let's be clear - he saw this on the news.) He slammed his little fist on the table and demanded that someone run in and save her. Kids are like that. They don't wonder if it's bad to let someone live; they think it's bad to starve someone to death. Ahhh, the innocence of kiddos... But when he heard I was going on a Hunger Strike, he darn near cried. He's so afraid I'll die, like Terri might if no one feeds or waters her. I told him I will get some water when I've gone as far as I can go. I'm going to try for 24 hours first, then I'll extend from there. The food is another story. I don't eat until Terri eats - or Terri dies. Something better happen soon - I have a wicked keen Caffeine headache... HUNGER STRIKE UPDATE  It's been about only two and 1/2 hours since I began the hunger strike, and I'm thirsty already. I usually have a drink with me at all times, so this part - the going without liquids - is going to be the hardest part. FELOS NEWS CONFERENCE Felos saying he was served by a U.S. Marshal and that the congress had told the Marshal to remove the feeding tube. But the Marshal's office states there will be no interferance by the Marshal's office. Calls those who do not wish for Terri's death are "opponents of Terri's rights". He says we are supposed to be ashamed. His insistence that these are Terri's wishes are solely based on what Michael Schiavo says, and Michael himself refuted that in his first deposition. Felos says Terri's family is free to visit right now and stay as long as they want. Also he says that pursuant to the order the sacrement of Communion was administered to Terri by a Hospice Priest before the tube was removed. He calls upon the constituents of Clinton to stop the opponents of Terri's impending death. Felos states that the only reason that Terri's tube was removed is because of Senator Wyden. He calls Wyden's efforts "courageous". WE ARE NOW OFFICIALLY ON HUNGER STRIKE Pamela Hennessey (The Long Farewell)Is now officially on Hunger Strike, and so am I. Farewell food. Farewell water. People outside in the group at Hospice are on fast as well... WHO DIED AND MADE GREER GOD?? Aww, just whackin' great. A county judge just decided he wants to override votes, laws, the will of the people, and now, the Federal Government. All hail the all-powerful Judge Greer! Wow, if he'd been in Birmingham, he'd have been able to stop the National-Whackin'- Guard. Get ready to rock and roll. I'm having my last meal now. Spicy pork rinds, coffee, and an iced tea. This is going to be a very stressful day, and Terri deserves better than to be at the whim of local martinets who want to kill disabled women... A REPRIEVE FOR TERRI - AND FOR US ALL? They aren't going to take away my coffee yet (or that other thing I sometimes also want, chocolate.) I am happy, and I believe I'll have another cup while watching today's drama unfold. But while I'm happy about coffee and chocolate, there is a family rejoicing just because their child - whom they love with all their heart - is being allowed to live. Let's bow our heads and beg God to forgive us for allowing such a situation to exist... Terri Schiavo is the embodiment of the struggle of disabled adults and children everywhere, those human beings who have been designated "less than human" and "life unworthy of life" by other humans who would profit from their deaths. Remember those who are physically or mentally challenged, and will be imprisoned in beds to await their own executions because they are not "aware". Remember the old, who have run out of money and usefulness for their families or doctors and will be imprisoned in nursing homes to await their "processing". Remember that it will be us next to be sacrificed upon the altar of perfection, if we choose to do nothing to save this woman and all those like her...  Here we go - one fully hydrated, non-pregnant 42-year-oldTerri Schiavo substitute. Gaze upon the horror! A living woman totally dependent on Food and Water!! Get ready to pull the nutrition and hydration... STUNNING OVERNIGHT DEVELOPMENTS IN TERRI SCHIAVO SAGA From DRUDGE:
READ MORE AT DRUDGEREPORT.COM And just in from the Associated Press:
READ MORE AT ABC.COM Surely it is God Who saves me I will trust in Him and not be afraid For the Lord is my Stronghold and my sure Defense And He will be my Savior... First Song of Isaiah, by Jack Noble White Thursday, March 17, 2005
HUNGER STRIKE FOR TERRI SCHIAVO: Life Without Food and Water Is Just Not Terri Schiavo is about to go without food and water, so those of us who have pledged to go on Hunger Strike are going to go without food and water as well. In order to demonstrate and protest the real nature of Terri's death, we are going to simulate her conditions in ourselves, and blog the whole thing. We're going to bring it out into the light, and make the world watch us go without. I'm a woman, about Terri Schiavo's age. I have the same organs, the same type of body. I have the same nervous system. I'm going to go without food just as long as she does, and I'm going to do my best to go without water for an extended period of time. I really don't want to do this, and that means I have to. Does that make sense? Of course not. But how silly of me. Everyone loves going without food and water. The Doctors and Lawyers have said it's a warm and fuzzy feeling to go without H2o and munchies, and we all know how much they have denied themselves this aforementioned life support. They wouldn't lie to us, now, would they? Think about it: that's why every time someone thinks about suffering - i.e., going without playing Halo2 for three days or giving up caffeine - they ALWAYS say: "Look, don't let me hurt, OK? Just take away my food and water until my tongue explodes and I die"... Yessirree BOB, everyone knows that the easiest way to drift off into a peaceful slumber is to give up nutrition and hydration. That's why all those little Ethopian kids always look so happy and peaceful. World Hunger? Pshaw, kiddies, that's called "drifting off". Your electrolytes will drop and whammo! Blissful slumber. That's what Michael Schiavo said on Nightline and I QUOTE, from ABC's Nightline Transcript: SCHIAVO: That's one of their soapboxes they've been on for a long time. Dawg yeah, it's not STARVING - it's going without NUTRITION AND HYDRATION! Get it right, you defugg-i-mented MORONS! RANT/Off Let's all try it. HUNGER STRIKE! Sounds like fun, hey? Rules? I'm not sure yet. I know I can go without food for at least three days, but just thinking about going without Caffeine (for all you grammar Nazis, that's capitalized on purpose) is horrifying. No caffeine. Expect a headache and brutal crankiness on Days 1-3. Water? I know I can do without for several hours, but I've never pushed myself as far as I can go. Now is the time to find out. If I can put in the first long stretch, then I can figure out how much to allow later. I thought about an ounce an hour, but that almost seems like too much. Should I attempt to go completely without until I break down, and then allow a little for each hour thereafter? If I never completely sate myself, then I might be able to simulate a little of the misery that accompanies real, dogging thirst... Oh, excuse me. They say it won't hurt. And we all know that the establishment has NEVER lied to us. Really. What about other forms of hydration? Water can be absorbed through the skin - that's why they are refusing Terri Schiavo even the last rites. Wouldn't want her to absorb some holy water through her forehead, would we? Yes indeed, the powers that be won't even let the Priest TOUCH her with anything moist - that might interfere with Terri's "right to dry". So does this mean I need to go without a shower? Without washing my face? I'm going to be hooking up the webcam for this little experiment, so I really don't want to be ugly for the world. But if I get in the shower, I might be tempted to just soak up the ambience for a while. It's more than Terri's getting, that's for sure. I guess I could limit my ablutions to a nice cool washcloth and a sink, but even that seems like cheating. It's still more than Terri's going to get. That's right - she doesn't even get her face washed. No chapstick, either. Okay, now this REALLY hurts. I wear lipstick or lipbalm all the time. It makes me feel pretty, and I don't want crispy lips. But so be it. If I crack and bleed, just consider it to be par for the course. I'll just be having some fun without nutrition or hydration, it's a real spree here, folks. Yes, I know, some wag will say I'm cheating, I'm really sipping a super Big Gulp (TM) while acting like I'm suffering here. Tell you what, I'll get my family to vouch for me if you like. My husband hates this idea. My mother thinks I'm nuts. They know me, and they know I'm going to do my best to marathon at this keyboard until I break down physically or mentally. I'll update the webcame as often as possible (I'm looking for some way to stream video, if I can, I'll do that) at least once every fifteen minutes. I'll be sure to show you when I finally sip water, and only go dark to sleep. But I warn you, this will not be pretty. ESPECIALLY with no moisturizer or Burt's Bees lip balm. I have only one thing left to do before beginning the Hunger Strike: Friday morning I will take a pregnancy test to ensure that I don't harm one an innocent life in an attempt to save another innocent life. Anything this extreme would be extremely damaging to a baby I might be carrying; and while that's a pretty remote possibility at the age of 42, I just don't want to take the chance. So another cool factor you get from checking in on the Hunger Strike is, if I'm miraculously geriatrically pregnant, you'll hear it here first. (That will be followed by some incredulous shrieking and squealing.) If not, well then, on with the Hunger Strike... I'm praying to God that I don't have to do this. I'm praying that Terri doesn't have to die this way. If they want to kill her, why don't they just do it the old fashioned way and strangle her with their bare hands? It would be so much kinder... But no, they have to do it in a sanitary way. A CLEAN way. A way that they have done to a bunch of other old people and folks who had no one to stand up for them. It's the way preferred by nine out of ten death advocates; withhold food and water while some poor soul screams in a room, surrounded by people who are watching them die horribly. So fresh and clean clean. Well, let's see just how much fun it is. Let's see how painless it is. I wonder why the Doctors aren't lining up to join us in this little experiment? Get ready to pull the plug on me Friday at 1PM eastern time. No food til Terri gets food, or dies. God, let this cup pass from me. Please. I'm not as strong as You... READ MORE AT BLOGGERNEWS.COM READ MORE AT Pamela Hennessey's Hunger Strike Blog TERRI SCHIAVO TO DIE IN ATTORNEY'S "DEATH FACTORY"? SUNCOAST HOSPICE BOSS WAS GEORGE FELOS... Man "finds" Wife unconscious. Man keeps Wife unconscious. Man gets malpractice money for Wife. Man wants Wife's money. Man wants Wife dead so Man can have money. Man gets Lawyer. Lawyer is/was Hospice Board Member. Lawyer promises Man that Wife will die at the Hospice...
Certainly one would hope that if the true role George Felos had been revealed in court, Judge George Greer would have made a much different ruling concerning Terri Schiavo's fate. Without knowledge of this conflict of interest, the Sixth Circuit Judge would be forgiven if he seemed to believe that such a noble institution as hospice - caring compassionately for the dying - could be trusted to make an unbiased report regarding Terri Schiavo's medical condition and with her care. With the information regarding this conflict of interest, the courts will be remiss to believe any evidence that Felos OR his "Hospice of The Florida Suncoast" might proffer in reference to Terri. Considering this new evidence, it is the opinion of this writer that the courts of Florida would be complicit in Felos' duplicity should they not review this ruling.
It is this writer's opinion that:
- How many elderly or infirm persons have Felos and the Hospice possibly exploited for monetary gain? It is the opinion of this writer that George Felos' "Hospice of The Florida Suncoast" is not an uninterested third party in this case, as they portray themselves to be. The Board of Directors hired Michael Shiavo's lawyer as their Chairman, then obscured Felos' role while bringing Terri under Hospice's care. "The Hospice of The Florida Suncoast" should come clean and come forward with any additional information they may hold regarding George Felos, Terri Schiavo, or any other hospice patients who may have been "represented" by Felos. The Hospice must also reveal any plans that they and their past Chairman of the Board may have for Terri's award money following her "facilitated" death.
Disclaimer: This article is the opinion of Becki Snow, and makes no guarantee as to the accuracy or reliability of its sources although the sources have been verified as accurately as possible through public record resources. This article may be copied and posted in accordance with fair use, in its entirety or excerpted, but only with full credit to the author and with notification to the author. Please notify the author by email at beckisnow@yahoo.com Wednesday, March 16, 2005
BREAKING: HOUSE PASSES INCAPACITATED PERSON'S PROTECTION BILL As per the Times Leader U.S. House passes bill designed to delay Schiavo case BLOGGERS FOR TERRI ENGAGE IN HUNGER STRIKE In a first for the blogosphere, a hunger strike has been organized in cyberspace for Terri Schiavo. Activists at the Hospice of the Florida Suncoast, where Terri is being held, will also be engaged in a hunger strike, and together perhaps we can show the world the brutality of dehydration and starvation. If you wish to join in and record for the world how painful hunger and thirst can be, please consider it prayerfully and visit the following site to learn more: The Long Farewell Pamela Hennessey has been one of the leading voices behind the fight for Terri Schiavo's human rights. Her argument in favor of this Hunger Strike protest is compelling: It is what it is READ MORE AT: The Long Farewell If you are unable to join in a full-fledged hungerstrike but still wish to participate, please consider signing up for a religious fast at the following site, Fast for Terri: This site is meant to be simple and straight to the point. If the US Court system forces Terri Schiavo's feeding tube to be removed now or at anytime in the future I vow before God that I will fast only on bread and water until her God given right as a human being, to receive proper nourishment, be restored. If in the event that Terri's right to proper nourishment not be given I will continue to fast. I ask others to join in the fight and Fast for Terri. May God have Divine Mercy on all of us. READ MORE AT: Fast for Terri Expect to see announcements on this blog and others in the coming days. Monday, March 14, 2005
NEW FLORIDA STATE BILL: A Call to action, via Free Republic - this meeting takes place tomorrow. Call your representatives TODAY! HB 701 CS -- Withholding or Withdrawal of Nutrition or Hydration from Incompetent Persons Sent: Monday, March 14, 2005 11:38 AM To: Undisclosed-Recipient:; Subject: HB 701's next committee hearing action alert! FLORIDA RIGHT TO LIFE 378 CenterPoint Circle, Suite 1250 Altamonte Springs FL 32701 407.834.5433 phone 407.834.5432 fax www.frtl.orgHB 701 CS -- Withholding or Withdrawal of Nutrition or Hydration from Incompetent Persons URGENT ACTION NEEDED!
Hearings and testimony on the Nutrition and Hydration Bill, HB701, will be heard tomorrow by the Health & Families Council at 9:30-11:00 a.m. Tuesday, March 15, in Room 102 at Reed Hall, in the capitol complex in Tallahassee. Anyone can show up at the hearing and fill out a form saying they want to testify. Benson, Anna Holliday (R)(Chair) Homan, Ed (R) (Vice Chair) Bean, Aaron (R) Brandenburg, Mary (D) Galvano, Bill (R) Garcia, Rene (R) Gibson, Hugh (R) Harrell, Gayle (R) Robaina, Julio (R) Sobel, Eleanor (D) Vana, Shelley (D) Discussion Points in Favor of the Bill
IS IT WRONG TO STARVE A BEING TO DEATH? (ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED FEBRUARY 22, 2005) Forget all the nuance and questions of worth - is it wrong to starve a being to death? Is it wrong for us to deprive other beings of liquid and life? Is it wrong to withhold the essence of living, until that which lives just withers away? Is it wrong for the white-coated doctors to watch as that being dies an agonized death? But Terri Schiavo is not human like us. We no longer recognize words that she speaks. Her cries are not fashionable; her laughter not comfortable. We no longer think that she thinks like we do; therefore, she is not as we are... and therefore -Is it wrong to starve a being to death? Would we kill a dog for a lack of humanity? Would we sit in the hall and gorge on a meal as it's nurses strap down and leave it to die? But Terri Schiavo is not an intelligent being. She does not contribute. She does not decorate. She suffers from a lack of enriching us, and therefore we suffer. Surely she would not wish to live if not as we are, enriching ourselves... and therefore -Is it wrong to starve a being to death? Would we cage a bird for it's lack of our minds? Would we sip a cool glass while we settle in close to watch it grow dull-eyed while thirsting to death? But Terri Schiavo is not a sentinent being. She does not feel pain. If she felt pain, she would surely be mad with suffering now... and therefore -Is it wrong to starve a being to death? To allow it to suffer so it will not suffer? To stop it from living so we may not see it? To dry it to death over days if not weeks, to inflict a famine and call it a mercy? To administer drugs and then say there's no pain when the last moment comes and the ache finally dies? To call it God's work and in peace close the door while those who will die rage in unending thirst? Shall we destroy all that is not what we deem it to be? Shall we dry all the forests because they don't think? Shall we kill every being that does not bring joy? Shall we ravage with hunger those beasts that don't fill us? Shall we sate our own selves while we starve all not us? Throw out your charges, deliver your thoughts, change all the laws to reflect your own image - But answer me this, all you merciful beings: is it wrong to starve a being to death? Answer the question. Choose your own fate. Friday, March 11, 2005
DO NOT GO GENTLE: Battling The Culture Of Death A set of ancient medical books rests on a redwood shelf in a corner: they belonged to my Grandfather, at the turn of the last century. Upon opening them, one finds the hopes and dreams of human beings committed to ending the suffering of the sick and disabled - not by killing them, but by healing them. Through all the books, like a golden thread, is the unbreakable, unshakeable ideal that Life is to be chosen over Death... Now, lay down the books, and pick up the newspaper. Read the new order, the new way of doing Medicine - the Culture of Death. Comes the new dawn of the new century, and it is blood red: a new age is heralded, the New Medicine, the Culture of Death. Death to those who wish it: Death to those who do not wish it: Death to all but those who are deemed worthy of choosing whom shall live and whom shall die. Imperfect children? Kill them. Ill elders? Kill them. Disabled adults? Kill them. How it is that we have come so far? Is there enough time to analyze, to dissect, to understand what it is that is drives the Culture of Death? No, there is not enough time. A monster is in this room, and we must destroy it - before it destroys us and all we love. If we are fortunate, there will come a day when we will stare at the corpse of this ugliness and we will study it to find out how it came to invade our space - how it came to usurp the sacred culture of life that has existed for thousands upon thousands of years. Now is not time to understand - there may be time later, if we live long enough to find out. But this is no gentle misunderstood beast; the Culture of Death has come in, invited, beckoned by those who wish it to visit us, the unwanted inconvenient, profitable masses. Ethical? Only if it favors Death's Friends. Indestructible? Only if it destroys Death's foes. Inevitable? Only if we let Death thrive unchallenged. Arm yourselves, all those who wish to live, to breathe, to be free to enjoy the same air as the rich, the young, the perfect wish to keep for themselves. Arm yourselves with the knowledge that this is a monstrous evil, good only in the minds of the few who wish Death to destroy us, the unchosen... READ the Hippocratic Oath; the thousands of years of sacred Oath, not born of Christians, but of ancient Pagans. The same Pagans who brought to the world Democracy and freedom birthed this incredible frame of the Culture of Life. Is this oath the work of extremists? Is it the cruelty of unwanted help? Or is it the pure unmitigated goodness of man, untainted by the machinations of Eugenics and Euthanists?
READ MORE AT NOVA.COM This is no tattered cloak to be cast aside and replaced with new morals; this is the shield which separates a patient from unscrupulous sorcerers, from men and women whose knowledge of the medicinal arts could be used to poison and taint and kill those who stood in the way of the powerful and the perfect. This is no ancient curiosity - it is the thing that transformed a profession from a tool of death into a bastion of life and cure. It is the vehicle of thousands of years of progress against disease and disorder, the ramrod which drives home the need to heal the sick rather than dispose of them. It is what stands in the way of the new sorcerers, the new purveyors of Death. They no longer take the oath: they destroy the old, the feeble, the unwanted, all for a fee. Why should the words of thousands of years ago stop them from achieving all they wish to achieve? For gold, they will end the lives of those who cannot meet the highest bid - after all, what harm is there in destroying the suffering rather than healing it? Especially if the road to destruction is paved with currency... Now the Beast is in the door: the Culture of Death has been bidden by those who once took the oath to protect us, the very doctors and medical personnel who once stood in our defense. They have found their Master is not a code of ethics, is not a God, is not an Oath - their Master is Mammon, and they will heal only those who will worship Mammon with them. Oh, but it is not so, the purveyors of Good Death say; their love of Death is fueled not by love of money, but by pure altruism. They are prompted by the need to release those who have no "quality of life" from burdening those who do have "quality of life": it is only Good to keep such creatures from becoming burdens to the system, from being unwanted elements in our otherwise Perfect world. But even in our generational memory, such treatment of the disabled and unwanted was considered to be not Good, but Evil. From the National Holocaust Museum: EUTHANASIA PROGRAM READ MORE FROM THE HOLOCAUST MUSEUM Ah, but this is different, the advocates of the Culture of Death explain. This will be voluntary. They continue: if sick, unwanted, or imperfect people are made aware of their choices, if they are made to see it is Good to die, then they shall surely choose Death. Death is preferable to imperfect life, they tell us; they speak as if it were always so. But it was not always so, not even in our own lifetimes. Spoke the poet, Dylan Thomas:
The purveyors of the Culture of Death beckon to us from the side of the Beast: "Starvation is good. Suicide is good. Death is good. Come stand in the line". For a fee, they will process us so we may serve the needs of the perfect, the powerful, of those who pay the most. The white coats and the sterile conditions will help to allay our fears until the hospital doors are locked behind us and we must face our deaths sans water, sans food, sans mercy, damned by our own sheepish apathy. "Come", they cajol. "It is the new way of Medicine. It is the way of Good." They are wrong. Only those who love Death could ever believe that destruction of life is "Good". The ancient medical books were not wrong; those who defeated the Nazis were not wrong; the poet was not wrong. Life is Good. There is no more time to reason with this Monster, to analyze it, or to understand it; it seeks to take power and destroy the Culture of Life. The time for battle is come. Take hold of the wisdom of the thousands of years, the belief that Life is Good; take courage, and prepare to do battle with the Culture of Death. It will not be the first time that mankind has battled this Evil - but if we do not win, it may be the last. READ MORE AT BLOGGERNEWS.COM Thursday, March 10, 2005
Terri Schiavo: The Real "Million Dollar Baby" A millionaire makes an unusual offer to Michael Schiavo: a million dollars for the life of his wife. According to World Net Daily:
READ MORE AT WORLDNETDAILY GREER: DCF MAY NOT INTERVENE BREAKING: Judge Greer Says "No" to Abuse Investigation by Florida's Department of Children and Families Mar 10, 3:07 PM EST READ MORE AT TAMPA BAY ONLINE More From Life News:
READ MORE AT LIFENEWS.COM Tuesday, March 08, 2005
Senator Martinez and Rep. Weldon Introduce Bill to Save Terri Schiavo The fight to save Terri Schiavo - and all incapacitated persons who may face "facilitated" deaths at the hands of caregivers - has two new champions: Senator Mel Martinez and Rep. David Weldon, both of Florida. According to Yahoo News: Press Release Source: Family Research Council Fire up the cannons: the battle for Life is joined... BLOGS FOR TERRI: URGENT INFORMATION ON INCAPACITATED PERSON'S LEGAL PROTECTION ACT Once again, Richard at Blogs for Terri is asking for help from all Life Activists - help pass this important new legislation. Your activism is needed, and it can indeed make the difference in passing this new bill into law. Please take time to read, and forward to your mailing lists: March 08, 2005 READ MORE AT BLOGS FOR TERRI Thursday, March 03, 2005
National Bill to Be Introduced: URGE CONGRESS TO ACT TO HELP SAVE TERRI SCHINDLER-SCHIAVO Via the The National Right to Life Website:
Tuesday, March 01, 2005
"Useless Eaters": The Right-to-Die, According to Hitler Nazi Germany, by all sensible accounts, was a racist, ethnocentric slaughterhouse. None who champion diversity would defend the Third Reich - so why do we allow the Nazi's ideological heirs to dictate medical ethics? For so we do; those who champion the modern "Right-to-die" have less in common with Mother Teresa than they do with Adolph Hitler. History bears this out: the extermination camps of the "Master Race" were born out of the twisted womb of Euthanasia. No one presentation makes this more chillingly clear than Regent University's work, "Useless Eaters". This heart-stopping presentation should be viewed for more than it's shock value - it should be required viewing for any who doubt the existence of the "slippery slope" of medical ethics. We should view "Useless Eaters" with the same determination as we view other, less valuable fare; we must allow ourselves to become acquainted with those on it's pages who are destined to die. We have an obligation to visit the images of crying babies, linger over the photographs of undesirable adults, impress their haunted faces into memory. Now let us impress upon our memory the face of Terri Schiavo, and all others who have or will suffer the same fate as she. They are the spiritual bretheren of these murdered innocents... Euthanasia, the extermination of undesirables, is taking place here, in America, now. We are being told it is for the good of the people; we are being told that this is the way it should be - that those who are handicapped, or brain-injured, or aged, or ill, are less than human. We are being told that starvation and thirst do not matter when they afflict the less than human, for they are not cognizant as we deign ourselves to be. Have we forgotten the first time we learned of the atrocities of Hitler's Germany? Do we not recall the condemnation we heaped upon the people of Germany for allowing such murderous acts to take place next door to their very churches and homes? Has it been so long that we no longer recognize evil when it comes to live with us, in our own country? We now have the chance to prove that we are not as blind as they... |
